i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
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