i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
My dog ate my bag of weed. Thats not the easiest call to the vet to make.
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
Tell me I'm the only person you know who could punch someone at the bar, get escorted out, smoke a cig with the cop who almost arrested me AND get the security guy who escorted me out to buy me drinks.
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
Randomize
