just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
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