You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
I think I found my soulmate. This guy in front of me is yelling about getting laid while holding two beers and texting. I think this is love.
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
Btw I puked in your glovebox
Randomize
