i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
Randomize
