I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
I created another version of Halloween, it's called swalloween, whatever girl in a slutty costume you bring home has to swallow or forever be known as the holiday grinch
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
Randomize