real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
We are two peas in an std pod
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
Nearly got hit by a blue bell ice cream truck. Can I count on you to make plenty of puns like "her life was sweet, and so was her death" at my funeral if that was to happen?
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
You came in yelling "I'm el scorcho" and then axe can flamethrowered my dresser. Awesomeness aside, you owe me a new dresser.
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