Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
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Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
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If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
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