Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
It's a combination of amazing uncoordination, bad luck, and sheer determination to cause destruction wherever I go.
Randomize
