Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
First Peyton Manning retires, and now the most interesting man in the world is retiring for Dos Equis. This is the worst week of my fucking life.
I just walked into my kitchen and my little brother is standing with his face two inches from the clock, staring at it, and eating an apple. I asked wtf he was doing and he just goes "the hour hand is moving VERY slowly".
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
Randomize
