people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
You slammed your face into the toilet and declared you were moving your bed into the bathroom in the morning. Also, you insisted on crawling everywhere because feet are "overrated."
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
I'm determined to sit on that face.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
Randomize
