We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
The chlamydia really affected his face.
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
Randomize
