You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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