I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
Randomize