used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
Randomize
