Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
Randomize
