Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
If we don't have crazy animal sex tonight at least twice, I'll know he's cheating on me.
Who wouldn't want crazy animal sex with you?!
A cheater.
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
Randomize
