I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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