it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
Swine flu. Run for my life!
I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
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