Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
Look I know it's late and I hope this doesn't wake you up but I feel like you should know that I'm sleeping on my couch in my own apartment so that my friend can get laid in my bed, and I would do the same for you.
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
Just found my glass of wine on top of the litter box. Every argument ever is invalid.
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
Verdict: uncircumcised.
Randomize
