You really coming over, don't trick.
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
Unless you watched your mom's very literal rendition of "I touch myself" while she was wearing a bikini, your vacation wasn't as bad as mine.
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
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