Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
Sometimes I forget to take my socks off when I masturbate. This always makes me feel like I'm accidentally in a porn.
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
Randomize
