You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
Apparently the cops had to handcuff me in order to get me to come with to the hospital with them. They asked me if I had had any experience with handcuffs before and I replied, "Only in bed." What a life
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
Randomize