some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize
