Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
Randomize
