She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
Just so you know, I choose to answer your bootytext tonight because it was the most creative.
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
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