your thong is hanging out like whoa
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
I just thought I should tell you that I always know what you are doing. Everywhere. Every time. -Your loving Mother
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
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