Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
You remember that guy i fucked in Ireland who stopped in the middle to talk about why he had 8 pillows on his bed? Yeah he's following me on twitter...
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
You were face down in the punch bowl, humming the theme to jaws
That explains the stains on my shirt
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
Is it bad that I coached my cousins 6 year old boy to steal a 30 rack of keystone out of an unattended cooler at our family reunion, or was I just giving him a social head start in high school? I err on the side of awesome.
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
Randomize
