I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
rest in peace liver.
It was nice having you occupy space in my body that could be holding beer n chicken.
that's going in my livers obituary.
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
Randomize
