I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes