I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
my shit smells like andre
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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