Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
Randomize
