Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
Randomize
