Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
My bathroom smells like artichokes and absinthe. I am naming a perfume after you and using the money to buy new towels.
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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