i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
Randomize
