yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
I mean technically the bite was both in my nose and on the outside of it. I thought I was going to need stitches or something.
Why was his mouth around your nose anyways?
It was just one of those nights, man.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
Randomize
