I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
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