dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
So I got offered a job this morning based on being a "good role model for girls" and I am drunk at 330 in the afternoon in "celebration." sometimes, life is insane. But not so bad.
Randomize
