I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
Even my vagina gasped.
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
My legs feel like baby dolphins
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
Randomize
