Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
Do me a favor. Next time I think it's a good idea to take pulls from the handle, yell "FALCON PUNCH" and uppercut me in the taint. My future liver thanks you.
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
Randomize
