Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
dude, osama threatened the US again
dude. i slept with your sister last night
what?
I saw that as an opertune moment to drop some big news
He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
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