so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
I thought spray tan was a myth
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.