In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
You know what, matt, a girl is not really that interested in a relationship if she goes down on you the first time she meets you
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Fun fact: My predictive text now prompts "walrus" as the most likely word to follow "intoxicated"...
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
Randomize
