Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
Please come over here so I can show off my beard, talk to you about how quantum computing is actually a symptom of interstellar physics, and then put my head under your dress
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
Randomize
