You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
I fell asleep with a half eating burrito in my hand and woke up to cat vomit with burrito in it.
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
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