Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
Randomize
