Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
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