I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
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