i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
There was no eligible dick at the ER. I'm pissed. Looks like "Searching for Strange at the Local Free Clinic" is a no go for the name of our first full length album. On the other hand, I got a dilaudid shot and I no longer feel like I have the worst bladder infection of my life.
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Randomize
