ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
Randomize
