Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
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