but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
I'm such a good drunk match marker. You single, you single... Drunk friend meet single boy. BOOM illegitimate baby made!
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
but dude how did I get so drunk?
Pretty sure it happened right after you poured a shot of Wild Turkey into your Budweiser, chugged it, and screamed "I. NEVER. BACK. DOWN!"
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
